What a ride

The saga continues:
I think that as much fun as I had riding with all you guys I had a better time around the campfire. Stories of the days adventures got embellished upon, jokes were told, stereotypes were at times proved and at others disproved. For example :

the English
I never would have known Taffy was from England due to the fact that he must have seen a dentist at sometime in his life. The whole bad teeth thing was disproved. On the other hand he can cuss you out very politely. Sometimes I did not even know that he was talking trash it sounded so nice. Taffy also doesn't seem to like his beer warm because he availed himself of my ICE COLD Dos XX with lime or Neil's Sam Adams when ever offered. I never once saw him put one near the fire to warm it up.

Le France
I never found LeFrog to be snooty. Mostly he was a quiet guy that laughed nicely at my bad jokes and I never ONCE saw him drop a rifle.

The Canadians
Now while it is true that they do say "EH" A LOT (at the end of every statement). None of them were burning a bowl at every opportunity. On the other hand I always thought ( and have known other north of the border types ) that were so proud of the Canadian beer that all they talked about was how bad our "PISS" was down here, that they couldn't possibly drink it especially since they brought a whole truckload of LaBlatts or Moose knuckle or what ever they call it up there. What I found to be true is that when they ran out of "good" beer they went to the store and bought MGD. Now thats about as bad a "piss" as they make here.

The Californians
I never heard the word "DUDE" come out of any of their mouths. They didn't ever bust out the bowl around me either. None of them ran up to a tree and started humping it or asking for a macroveggiewrap with free range goat cheese. Brendan is the only guy I know who can stay awake for about 50 hours and then decide to change a wheel bearing. He is not relaxed. Corona is a rather "relaxed " personality until he gets ridding but that is about as bad as the whole Kaliforina thing goes.

The two Hicks from the Land of Daughter Wives ( I can say that and not be in trouble because I am a transplanted Hick).
Neither one played country music at 6 am or gave a rebel yell at midnight.We never had a dish with possum. I did how ever have to ask big bro " what the *&%# are you doing with my lime"? Much to my embarrassment it was HIS LIME he was destroying trying to squeeze it into a CORONA. That choice of beer is only slightly higher than the MGD of the Canucks.

BK
Just what do you consider yourself? Your not a Canuck but your not a westerner either. I think you are just a Newyorker that cant settle down yet. Well maybe it's the whole Air Force thing.

Now that leaves the rest of us ( or should I say me and my rowdy buddies)
Yes we upheld the stereotype of the " Ugly White Trash Americans". We farted out loud and didn't say excuse me. Stayed up too late and were loud, made the rest wait for us to ride. Whined about where we were going and who we had to ride with and were just generally a pain in the ass.

In all seriousness ( yeah right ... from me? )
I have not met and spent time with a better bunch of guys who come from all different backgrounds, jobs, and cultures, we all have two things in common;
1 We ride dirt bikes
2 Most have, had, or are going to ride Husabergs.
Its good that just a small thing in common lets us all explore each other and find other common bonds and not really notice our differences. And if we do notice them we choose to over look them.

There are some people who I would have liked to spend more time with at Moab,

The Kids
Thanks for being GOOD kids and not making me wish you were not there. All of you were good. Splat your oldest son is about to be REAL fast, I just hope he doesn't wad up. Remember how we were all bullet proof once?
Kenny, Idle down and smother throttle control and you will lose most of your problems.

Husabutt, you were smart to keep your family away from the fire. It was "Men behaving badly" and I hope we didn't offend your wife or son.

Joe USA sorry your knees gave out next time we will try for some less rocky trails for those who want them.

Dez you were off to bed too early and no one had the leash on Tuts.

Tuts I think you and I are very simnilar but different . Now thats a Tutsism

Ossaman you got speak up more. I think there is more to you than is apparent at first glance.

BK you must think your old cause you were the life of the party but around 9pm you turned into a pumpkin.

Splat The same goes for you as for Husabutt, but, thanks for all the work you and your wife did in the background and beforehand. You are one of the people who MADE this happen.

Andy you are too deep for me at the fire after too many beers but I should have listened to you sober and I think I would have learned more about bike setup.

Velosapians Man were you fun when you had a load on. And a good trail leader if only you had looked back in the first 10 miles. Just kidding but the explanation of your name to me was enlightening. I thought it was some weird kind of sex thing. Well I guess it is: Less **** and more Velo. That deep from a guy living in ELY NV. If I thought I could keep up with you I would ask to ride with you in Ely.

Corona
I gotta come on the bass lake or bear lake or whatever lake ride you were talking about .

Berger what can I say but you are too good. And to think you probably wanted to kick my ass in the first three minutes I met you. You were the other FORCE behind this gathering and I know I speak for all of us :THANKS!

Jason and Charles
Brothers for sure and both a panic EH HUH?
Jason is The best story teller I have had the pleasure of listening to. He had Fryguy crawling in the dirt and trying not to faceplant and me thinking I was going to throwup, spewing beer from my nose, both of us from laughing so hard at the Walmart-Bug story. There is a lot to Jason as you all know from the site but in person it is all so much more.

If I left anyone out it was not due to you being an ass but more due to it being too short and too much packed into the time.
You all might not be able to say it about me but I will say it about all who attended: I would like to have the pleasure of you company again anytime.

Dez,Tuts,Brendan,Ossaman you all live pretty close and I would like of take you and any of the others who would make the trip on a ride to Austin Nv. Lets stay in touch.

Since Jason is such a good story teller I will leave the last day of our ridding adventures for him to relate. It wasn't the hardest trails but I sure had fun and have great memories.

Brett thanks for the goodies. I know Lee was not here to sell us, but, from listening to him you have a good ambassador for the brand. He did take some of the bad taste out of my mouth from past experiences.

And for those of you that MISSED IT. TOOOOO BBAAADDD!!!Everything that has been written here doesn't come close to telling how much fun we really had.
Thank You All

As hard as it may be to believe, everything that Bobzilla imparted in his inimitable style is a rank understatement.

To witness a storytelling sessions between Json and Bobzilla with Tuts throwing in sly (and not so sly) comments was awesome. I missed the whole Fryguy on the ground thing as I was whupped and collapsed into an early stupor, but if it was half as funny as the re-telling it was a gem.

Thanks to Bob, Taffy, Ossaman, and John for picking me up multiple times.

The Phoenix guys were invaluable in making it a spectacular ride and an unforgettable event. You guys knocked it out of the park on the first try. Ken and Brian.....you are first class.

Thanks to everyone for not making it all about the riding. Except for Neil getting seriously hurt it was as nearly perfect. Thanks to all of you for an irreplaceable memory.
Dez

P.S. I signed up at Gold's Gym. Is it too late in life for me to start taking steriods and HGH? I wanna be like Coronaberg, seven feet tall and able to LIFT his bike over obstacles!

"We're going to pump you up" Arnold.

Joe, glad you made the drove home ok. Sorry that we abused your legs in the sand wash and creek riding. Next year, you tell Peggy "No one is allowed to bring work to the Force Ride" :wink:

i've not written a full epic nor will i, i guess because sometimes it's better that it comes out in dribs and drabs. there are plenty of people here who have explained how it went and given the non-attendees a glimmer of what they missed.

first of all there was room for all types on this trip. the hardened drinker, the early to bed, the eater, the rider. we all seemed to fit because we didn't make big demands. ok, ok splat wanted early starts but i conceal a great deal of experience at organising and the skill is the do-able versus the ideal and splat figured it smoothly. credit brian, is not always given for what you organise and strive for but how you adapt to how people just enjoy things in their way. this you did really well.

i for my part found myself going out there without really sorting my finances as they are short. i believe that i owe bobzilla a few beers and the cannucks. bksavs and tuts were damn good to me as well but i leant on bob too much. i had the money but i didn't say "give me a lift to the local off licence (licqour store)" a bit like putting off the dentist.

i hope i'm justifying splat's faith with the discovery of a stator which puts him 'quids in' and i've been fairly generous to kenny/berger on the donation for the bike scene. thanks berger for the ride on the opening day. the FC550 was beautiful and i found the rekluse clutch gave me an easy ride. i adapted to it in 50 yards.

i still have to put things right with fryguy and i will but i only got home wednesday; jetlagged and phuqed.

i went down twice. it was the crash on fryguys bike on the 3rd day which pissed me and then on the 4th day with only a few left i did it again with only a mile to go. a real biggy at about 40mph coming down the track towards the car park on the north side of town. i was stood upright and came round a left and leant into another left when the whole bike was gone. i pounded the floor for 30 yards and stood up dumbfounded. i'd hit an orange rock on the orange road on my left hand side whilst cranked over to the left.

it was my first fall in 5 years where i had time to think like a roadracer and study how i fell and plan what i hit. i have a blue/brown kidney still and lots of skin missing. i was wearing full body armour in a strong string vest. i would have been in big trouble without it.

i have holes in my trousers and short that have wasted them. i could barely get in and out of the RV with splat at the grand canyon.

here are my thoughts

BKSAVS-calmed down eventually and at times could be ok but you need to ask as well as tell my friend. serious drinking starts after you go to bed and not before!

bobzilla-i have so much time for you my friend. you need someone to say it how it is and set the party going. wear your colours and hope you're not the only one who likes a beer. you weren't let down! top man and all the way from nev adda and not nev arder as he tells me.

neil (shaggy) bob couldn't have a better employee/work mate. a solid bloke and these two the english would respect.

tuts-i didn't know that the bloke i swopped bikes with on day 1 would actually be a kindred spirit. we got on very well and he was a real laugh, even i know a 'knicks' accent when i hear it. we want back on day 1 (pm) and day 2 (am) "helping our UHE buddies and stacking the mileage! well, it's better than standing still and waiting!

jason-goes from automoton to a complete star and i don't know now what possesed him to become a web site geek. a comedian would have been more like it.

rider of the week is dead simple for me and that is coronaberg. he had a fan club by the end. hardly any mistakes in the A group in three days and all at 49 years. he picked the VOR on the third day just as his body started telling him things. he finally fell. i was wishing he would in the end, i was following him once and i thought "what keeps this man going?"

he stalled the bike at the end of D3 and i whipped past leaving him and fryguy-the guru, the svengali-of riding behind. i joined the awaiting crew. no corona, no fryguy, the ride had been punishing. "it'll be corona" i said, he can't keep that up. i rode back. it was fryguy being towed in by corona with a dead stator!!!! what did i say

top rider was either velosapiens or fryguy. but fryguy gets my vote because he never spouted, never lost the ability to help, to do it after all had tried and ultimately he rode the harder bike-a husaberg as opposed to a katoom 300 2-smoke. an ideal machine if ever i saw it.

funniest moment (riding) was seeing all the middle and C boys going over the bars at the drop to that first stream. lemmings or what! sorry dez and a few others but it was funny after a while!!!!

prat of the week wasn't the one nearest to me but oddly enough someone who spoke rarely and had little to say except be clever (bob that means a smart ass!). bring a berg and i may have forgiven him..........

berger had his own agenda, i couldn't work it out at first but i think he did the right thing by simply getting aboard and riding-the brotherhood liked that! those bikes were immaculate and he thinks polotik is a fayking good track and anyone who likes coldplay knows their stuff.

the other two cannucks i got to know well on day 4. dave and sean? dave is a great bloke-solid-married, deseased oops!!! sorry where was i-aaah! yes solid! when all about you are changing their stators, if you can keep your head then you will be a man who enjoyed his holiday my son!

sean? barking. woof woof! but as a threesome they were tight, well they weren't tight coz after the big ride on day two sean went to bed early. the only one on the A list so he is now officially a tart! (note; in england tight = drunk).

concours de elegance goes to dezduster-what a drop dead gorgeous bike that old husey is-all resplendant in yellow!

the place, moab, was fantastic to ride at. in the end the cabins were poor but the layout was nigh on 100% perfect. i don't feel that we could have had a good HUSABERG time though with any less. that was the minimum. we often had less than 50% of the machines out.

if you have one in less than a year thenm you'll dilute it and it won't do so well. one year? yes, i think you can do it. me? i'd keep my powder dry for 24 months (that means wait bob ok?) and have certain rules about non bergs such as 50% of a group must be on a berg. or a non berg is ok for a non UHE member etc.

i had a great time. i could offer a group of 4 or 5 of you a really good ride here in the Uk in return if you ever feel that you can afford the $400 flight fair here. i'm sure i could put the same together here.

it's better to swop or barter than it is too pay. all it needs is harmony, trust and friendship. it can happen.

a big thank you again to fryguy for the bike on days 2, 3 and 4.
to splat for collecting me from the airport and returning me there on top of the 10 hours up and the 12 back via the grand canyon. for swopping bikes early on day 2.
to berger for the bike on day 1 and acting as banker.
thanks to dezsuster who if i'm correct bought me two meals.
to tuts for beers to bksavs for beers and to the cunnucks and bobzilla-f.....ya!!!!

regards

Taffy

Taffy said:

if you have one in less than a year then you'll dilute it and it won't do so well. one year? yes, i think you can do it. me? i'd keep my powder dry for 24 months

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The fall ride is mainly for scouting trails for next year. We won't have as many people attending. The pictures will be the teaser for next years event.

Taf, I was just starting to understand you and now your gone and oh I hate to say it but.. I miss you. No worrys about the beer... I brought enough that I must have thought I was a Canadian. Some there mus have thought me and Neil were "tight' as you say. I took two cases home plus a bottle of wiskey and Neil one of Gin.
You were more fun and straight shooting in person than you are here. And thats going somewhere.
I think we do need to work on that dictionary.
And Taf **** you too!! and I mean that in the nicest way.